Our expert says:
Obviously, divorce can be upsetting to the kids - not necessarily so, as I've seen kids happier when the tensions between their parents subside, and better than while the parents stuck together unhapilly and angrily. But the children's reaction is very much influenced by the mood and behaviour of the parents. So try to avoid bitterness and anger between you in situations where the kids will witness this.
I don't like the idea of separating the children from each other - there's no need for them to divorce, too !
I think it'd be better for them both to stay with you, and to visit their father when they wish to, up to an agreed maximum frequency of visits. I expect most child psychologists ( who you could consult to assess and discuss it with the kids and reveal their wishes ) would agree.
Where a marriage has been unhappy, most kids can understand a divorce between their parents, though there is a risk that they will blame themselves, and feel it might be because of something they have done ( or not done ).
But it will be much harder for them to understand why they are to be split apart.
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