Posted by: Flower 1980 | 2009/03/20

HElp with 5 year old son

I have a problem with my 5 year old son. I am in tears and so angry towards him I don' t know what to do. Yesterday his nanny told him that he pulled off her granddaugher who is a year younger than my son panty off and licked her fanny.Last year the teacher caught him pulling a boy in his class pants off. But now the nanny is saying this is not the 1st time that he did that to her granddaughter, but why did' nt she tell us about the 1st time. Ask him why he did it 1st he said he don' t know,then the said the girlie said (we must play that game.) we had a meeting with the other parents I was so upset I couldnt even speak.I dont know what to do or who to blame.My son does not watch any movies that contains sex,he doesnt sleep with us, nor has he eva caught myself and husband in bed. I ask him if some1 did something like that to him and he said no. But if he did do it, why would a 5 year old or even if it was the girl think of things like that. Is that a sigh that my son might be sexaully abuse,What does it mean

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Whatever the reason, he has an excessive interest in sex and apparenrtly doesn't feel inhibited aout exploring other people, whether they want it or not. Seeing a child psychologist / counselor would probably be the quickest way to sort this out. It is possible that someone has sexually abused him, but actuall some sex play and exploration between children is more common than we like to think. But if indeed he was abused, as m2cw says, your anger and anguish and embarrassment at what you had heard probabl inhibited him from talking about it. And the probably reactions at the school probably had the same effect. A counsellor / shrink is skilled at making a child feel comfortable talking about such things.

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Posted by: My 2 cents'  worth | 2009/03/20

I think there' s a possibility that someone is/has sexually abused him or he saw that somewhere. The fact that you mention that you were so angry at him you couldn' t even speak, could mean that that' s the reason why he couldn' t tell you if someone had done that to him or where he saw that cos he was afraid you' d be angry at him. Maybe try to calmly ask him what' s going on without coming across as intimidating &  make him trust you &  that if someone did do that to him it' s not his fault &  he must tell you, you' ll support him, love him etc... OR take him to a child psychologist.

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