Our expert says:
Face facts. If she really does not want you in her life, for reasons that seem reasonable to her, that's it. No amount of wishing on your side will bring her back. But the situation sounds more fluid than that. It is sad when someone gives up on a relationship without making any realistic attempt to fix it, as with relationship counselling, and apparently this is what she did. She sounds confused, and pinning her hopes unrealistically on geographical solutions. Having her own place away from her mother won't make it any easier for her to decide about your relationship. But that claim enables her to postpone the decision.
When she says : "she knows how it feels to wait for someone and to find out that person has moved on leaving you stuck", this doesn;t sound as though she is talking about you --- has something else happened to her, earlier on, that matches her description here ? If so, she may be unrealistically judging her relationship with you on the basis of some other failed and hurtful experience.
Counselling, for each of you, and perhaps eventually for both of you, might help clarify matters and sort them out. But she sounds at present reluctant to find a solution
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