Our expert says:
Phew ! A 1300 word question ! This may be a record ! Sorry to comment on that, but this is a really long message to digest.
I wonder whether the psychiatrist she saw was misled by her lies into diagnosing some sort of psychotic illness, and thus a treatment for that - which would not help at all, as nothing you describe sounds in the least like a psychotic illness.
Frankly, from your description, she has a malignantly unpleasant severe personality disorder, perhaps Sociopathic Personality Disorder, and in addition she's a spoilt brat.
I agree with the others - if she wants to claim the advantages of adulthood at 18, she must accept the responsibilities, too.
Rad up about Tough Love, and start practising it. NO further internet acess nor cell-phone time or any other luxuries whatsoever until she can pay for it herself from WORK. If she steals anything from you or the house, call the police and lay criominal charges against her, having explained clearly to her, in advance, that this is what will happen. Give her a couple of months at most, to get a job and to move out to her own place, and to pay for that, and everything else she needs, herself.
THis will be very difficult for you as you love her so much, but she has been blatantly abusing your love. You must learn to love her in a distant way, that requires her to behave like a responsible and loving adult, or accept the consequences of misbehaving. You have been doing far too much for her, encouraging her to do far too little for herself or for anyone else.
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