Our expert says:
David, try to chill. I see no reason for you to hate yourself--- from what you say, you did nothing wrong, and even if you had, it would have been a foolish thing that got done, but nothing deserving this degree of hate and conflict. Sounds like your dad has not been handling this very well, but maybe neither have you ; and you could both have got yourselves tied up in this conflict, without finding a way for both of you to get out of it and save face. Would he consider enabling you to see a counsellor ? That would help you to sort out your feelings and plan more positive responses towards sorting out the situation. Maybe there's some counselling available through your school, or through your GP.
Just because you can't at this moment see the purpose of your life, doesn't mean that there isn't one. Adolescence is a difficult phase in which we start wanting to be able to see such things clearly, before they have become clear. You are capable of doing significant things during the rest of your life, but we don't all get the game plan at the beginning, and have to work on discovering it as we go along. And don't worry about Sports. People who are incapable of anything else pretend that this is awfully important, but it never is. It's a comforting distraction for people who don't like dealing with reality --- which is fine, so long as they don't take part in the wicked step of rejecting people who don't play sport and make them feel bad. besides, 99 % of those who boast of being "sportemen" don't play anything at all --- they sit on the couch eating pizza and drinking beer and watching it on TV. That can be a pleasant recreating for them, but let nobody pretend that it's something so important that people who don't join in, have anything wrong with them.
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