Our expert says:
If it's harmless and makes you feel calm, it could be useful --- though not if it takes so long that it makes you late for work. Maybe you can choose a favourite bit of it, like a shorthand link to the calm feelings you associate with it. I understand that this isn't sexual, and it seems instead to be about being nurtured, comforted, and feeling safe. Now, it might be worth explorin in counselling, to find better ways to include those good feelings within your usual life, and to feel worthy of the nurturing even without needing to be that wild outlaw first !
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