Posted by: happy | 2004/02/24

happilly single

hi doc
i'm female, 27 and single. i'm happy being single, but am so tired of everyone from friends, family to people i've just met enquiring why i'm single and not settling down. it's like there's these unwritten rules that when you come to a certain age you're expected to be in a relationship and planning your mortgage and wedding at the same time. they say i'm being difficult when i get upset when they try fixing me up with someone and that i shun love..i don't, i'm just not ready for settling down.. in my line of work i meet lots of interesting people, so i'm not short of friends and companions..but why can't some people understand that i love my single life ?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I think unhapilly married folks get jealous of contented singles, and try to push you into sharing their boredom. Hapilly married folks may hope you'll find similar happiness, but are seldom so meddling. Each of us needs to make the choices that best suit us, not those that suit other people. Indeed, cherish your happy singledom, and change that satus only when you want to, and when and if it suits you. Maybe the answer to the medlers is "I'm very happy the way I am --- and I hope you're at least as hapy with the way you are."

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Our users say:
Posted by: N@S | 2004/02/24

I think that people are jealous because you actually enjoy being single. Most people want somebody and don't feel complete without someone.

Reply to N@S
Posted by: jealous | 2004/02/24

Happy, you sure make me jealous! After 20 years of being "attached". I sumtimes just long for those happy single days to do as I like with nobody to report to. Next time when sum1 asks u that silly question, reply with "what, and end up like U!" - I'm only joking...............but enjoy your single life to the fullest and DO NOT ever let anyone talk you into getting attached.

Reply to jealous
Posted by: LP | 2004/02/24

I agree, singledom is great!! I mean, just look at this forum : 90% of problems are relationship-related and the people involved are too scared to be single, too scared to let go, too scared to be their own person!

Seems like society thinks it is better to be a battered wife/cheated-upon spouse/abused partner/doormat for another etc etc than to be unmarried.

Sure, many people find extreme happiness in marriage, but there are many others who are happy being single and yes : fortunate enough not to be one of the unhappy spouses.

Cybershrink mentioned a while ago that singledom should be cherished.....but I think society has a long way to go before it realises that being without a ring is really not a sad state to be in!!

Reply to LP

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