Posted by: Anonamous | 2008/11/11

gynae visit

Hi I always groom before I go to my gynae, my husband does not like it, he hates me going to the gynae without him, I once let him come in and see the procedure about 14/15 years ago, and I thought that was enough. He gets so stressed out that I only tell him afterwards, he is not jealous or possessive at all, but becomes quite different at that time of year because I dont let him come in with me. I like and trust my doc and so does he ,but he has some primitive way that he always wants sex after my appointment, to like reclaim his territory, this I find ridiculous. When he came in, then he was fine, you would think that it would be better for him not to be there, but I would love to have opinions, and find out how abnormal this is, we have a great relationship, and a great sex life, why would a doc worry him, he is not concerned about professionalism between me and the doc, but always likes to be present, even at a normal doc.Help

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

It is not all that uncommon a phenomenon for men to experience emotional reactions when their partners visit a gynae, especially if the gynae is a male, and that the medical examination involves the area of his partner's body that has significant meaning to him. There is something to be said for your theory about a "primitive" response and a need to "reclaim" his territory. I would be careful of labeling your husband's reaction as "ridiculous". What is important is that both of you have feelings about this situation in your relationship, and communication is essential where you are both able to communicate your thoughts and feelings in this regard and negotiate a solution you are both able to accommodate to.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Lee | 2008/11/12

I think all men feel very uneasy when their women have to visit their male gynae. Think about how you would feel if your husband had to visit a female doctor where she had to touch and look at his penis. As much as you would understand that it' s strictly a doctor-patient relationship, there would still be a feeling of being uneasy with the idea of another woman looking at your man' s privates.

There' s no need to be upset with your husband, or to think anything of it. It' s perfectly normal, and I think you need to be more understanding of how he must feel.

Allow him to come with you to your gynae visits, and from there he must decide if he wants to watch the gynae at work, or wait in the room. Explain you would feel more comfortable if he did not watch the procedures, and maybe you both can find a compromise.

Reply to Lee
Posted by: Anonamous | 2008/11/12

His only solution is to accompany me, this is uncomfortable for me and the doc, i now let him wait outside, thats my compromise.

Reply to Anonamous

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