Our expert says:
Around the time of a break-up or divorce, we are all more vulnerable to becoming emoptionally involved unwisely, and with anyone who shows us kindness and sympathy. And both of you were similarly vulnerable at the same time. If you recognized these for what they were, which is what you seem to be saying, why did you allow this to develop into an affair ? You describe this as though you were both manipulated by some external force, rather than recognizing that you are both adults and had, and have, other choices, and chose to let things proceed the way they did.
You know that what you are doing is wrong. See a counsellor if necessary, but you both need to take responsibility for your choices and actions. YOu don't get kidnapped and dragged to each other --- you choose to get together,
Just stop --- agree this together and stick to it. Stop calling each other, stop meeting, get busy with some other more wholesome activities. And he should see a marriage counsellor with his wife, to heal his existing marriage.
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