Posted by: C | 2004/10/15

Guidance needed

I am not too sure how to approach this subject but i have to get some advice somewhere! My boyfriend is 27 years old and in the 2 1/2 yrs that we have been dating i have noticed how we have both put on a considerable amount of weight. Not only that, but we became very unhealthy. I have since taken the step to join a weight-loss programme (a helathy one!) but i am very concerned about my boyfriend. I have studied nutrition and know much more than him with regards to it, and although i did not use that knowledge to keep myself healthy, any advice that i give to my boyfriend makes him upset- as he takes it personally. Therefore i would like him to read this, and perhaps he eyes will be opend slightly? For example- i told him that the following is NOT a healthy breakfast choice, but once again he took it personally: A glass of milk with raw egg, 2 teaspoons of sugar, vanilla essence and oats. He thinks its healthy, but i KNOW its not!! Am i right? Please help me- how do i approach the subject with him- i care about him and his health!

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Our expert says:
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Dear C
I think your boyfriend is reacting in this way because he feels that you are trying to boss him around. It is very difficult to change someone's eating habits if they are not convinced that they need to change. You can only lead by example. When he sees that you are achieving good results, losing weight and getting fitter, then he may well decide to follow your example. But the first step must come from him and he must want to do this. His breakfast choice is not really so bad, except that it is advisable for adult SA men not to have an egg a day - 4 a week is the prudent recommendation! Keep this entire exercise for him to lose weight and get healthy very low key so that he does not feel pressurised.
Good luck

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