Our expert says:
Sad tale. At least it's lunar eclipses, and not solar eclipses you need to wait for. I agree that suicide is not, and should not be considered an option, as you obvously deserve a whole lot more than that. Yes, frustrating it must be. You cannot be helped if you believe that you cannot be helped. But if you want to find your way out of this frustrating impasse, you can --- with an appropriate guide. You don't have to trust the shrink to know everything and especially not to know exactly what you ought to do and to take control over you --- but he/she WILL be able to have expertise in helping YOU to find, productively, what you need to do. If you were lost in a jungle, you'd welcome a guide who knew the territory round there. The same here. Pick a good local guide to mental territory, to work with you, on finding your personal solutions. This CAN be solved, if you will allow this to happen.
You have a great son, and obviously excellent business skills ( even if you perhaps carry too much of the burden yourself ).
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