Our expert says:
Post traumaric stress doesn't exist at all. You surely were deeply distressed, and may have experienced a difficult grief. Possibly, if it was diagnosed properly by a properly trained shrink, you might have developed Post Traumatic Stress DISORDER, PTSD. Whatever the diagnosis, it must have been a terrible time for you. But it isn't necessary to live with a "hole in the heart" as you say - see a good pychologist / counsellor with experience in helping people work through grief, and you can work through this ( grief work is indeed hard work ) and become able to remember them with joy for all that was good about them, rather than bitterly for the fact that they were lost to you.
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