Our expert says:
Your first line really says it all: "The problem is not with me, but my husband"
Many women feel an immediate need to deal with the problems they have with their spouses when they come for sex therapy. However, it is a basic truth that change must begin with the self. Beginning with personal work anchors us in our authentic loving selves and develops an appreciation for the complexities of change. We can make new choices for ourselves although we may not be able to change our partners. The following questions enable you to review your life story with regard to your sexuality.
There are seven basic areas:
1) Issues of mistrust and sex-negative messages,
2) wounds from primary attachments,
3) self-esteem and control,
4) distortions of compassion
5) fear of self-disclosure,
6) visualization, and
7) inspiration and guidance.
These are the 7 areas that i cover during therapy, however, you need to decide whether you can approach the subject with your husband, or get professional help.
Contact SA Sexual Health Association 0860 100 262, for a referral in your area. Or FAMSA of Lifeline.
If he doesn't want to join you for therapy, maybe it will be helpfull for you to go and it will be helpful to assist you in becoming more assertive and improve your communication skills.
The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal
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