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Question
Posted by: TV | 2006/04/19

Girlfriend loves TV too much!

My girlfriend is 28 and im 33.She has one child and i dont have any. we have been together for the past two years and love each other. the problem is She watches too much TV and Videos. She would rather watch tv the whole day.She does not work and I do work. I see her every forthnight and we are in a ditance relatonnship. she in jhb and me in Pta.I she does not like watching news and other educational projects on tv when she's around and i miss the news. she's semi illiterate and went afar as std 6 according my knowledge. she does have time to read newspapers and if she does it only lasts for a few minutes and goes back to watch tv. She said there's a tv in her home but it's a small one and they are so many people in the house for only 1 tv and she cannot watch the programmes that she likes when someone wants to watch a certain programme. But this TV thing is geeting a bit too far cause she is also anti social and likes isolating herself from people and when we go out to visit my friends she will never say a single word to them not even laugh. she will look at the TV screen even if the volume is down and will also ask us to leave the place cause she is not comfortable. when we reach my flat she switches on the tv aand watches whatever is being screened at that time. i have wasted a lot of money on hiring movies and dvd's. she has difficulty in writing, reading, understanding logical things and reasoning and naming things. when u ask her something she will hesitate b4 she answers or does not answer at all. I love her and im aware that she loves me but people take advantage of her expecially her friends and she is not aware of this. she thinks it's normal.what's wrong with her? does she need psychological treatment.
She is still old school in many things if u know what i mean. pls help where possible Sir. I want to help her too.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I wonder whether she feels shy and awkward facing other people and real-life situations, and prefers spapies and other fantasies instead, and watches TV in preference to getting involved with real people ? Maybe with her lack of education she feels embarassed among better educated people, and feels unable to follow the news and more educational programs. This is sad, because with proper selecton of programs, TV can help someone educate themselves. Check out facilities for adult education programs, where she could learn to read and write more comfortably, and check also for possible facilties for some counselling to help her feel more self-confidence. Does she have any other interests, such as children or animals, for instance ? If so, she could become involved in charity work, helping to care for sick kids, or animals welfare, and both become interested and involved with other people, and feel more competent and then confident in herself. And as ME suggests there are also courses such as dress-making whatever in which she may find she's really skilled in working with her hands, and could even gain skills that could help her make a job for herself, as well again as feeling more active and competent

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Our users say:
Posted by: Me | 2006/04/19

Cant you perhaps organise for her to attend udult school. she is not working so it will be easier for her, as she can even attend during the day. i know some universities and technikons do offer udult programmes. there is also an option of doing a course that is not necessarily academic, like dressmaking, cooking courses, flower arrangement etc. she can aslo earn a living from such courses.

maybe her being obssessed with watching TV is due to the fact that she has nothing to do.

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