Posted by: marconi_love | 2004/10/19

Girlfriend and Sister son.

How do I handle this, I met this girl last year and we are staying together. She is divorce 34y of age. Have a son 8y and they both are staying with her mom.
Her sister had a son many years ago witch her mother brought up. He is know 21 years of age.
At the time when we were dating, the girl and this guy was very close. At night when I get there to visit these two will sit together with her laying on his shoulder holding his leg watching TV. For me this was not normal. I spoke to her and asked her out about it and then it came to a stop. But I knew that these two have a close relationship. Which I understand
She is know staying with me. But sometimes when we go visit her mom and this guy is in his bedroom, I can see how she cannot resist going to his bedroom. It is as if she is looking for that connection. I am a kind of sensitive person and can easily read a person mind by the way they are reacting.
She will the suddenly get up go to his room. The door then close, what is happening inside there, I do not know. Know that she s staying with me I now they have completely contact with each other behind my back. As she is aware that I am wondering what is going on. In a way I think she is hiding it because she is scared she is going to loose me. But what I cannot understand is…..How can the same blood persons be so close that you cannot weight to get to each other.
I know for now that they cannot be sexual at this stage as there are too much feelings involved. But could it be that at some stage there feelings for each other could have became sexual. But still they do realize that they cannot have a future together.
For me it is sometimes as if they have a closer relationship then me and she. They help each other financially and they speak all there problems with each other. It sometimes feels for me as if they had to stay together it would work out better for them both.

Am I blindfolded by love? For me it is abnormal, as I have never had a relationship like this with any of my own family members.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Hello m-l,
This could be just an innocent close-family thing, but it's hard to understand why she needs to close the door and visit him in his bedroom, when they could easily leave the door open if it's all innocent, and he could get out of bed to great her outside the bedroom. You do need to talk this through seriously with her. And remind her that sex between aunt and nephew also counts as incest, which is illegal.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Juzlisen | 2004/10/20

Yes some family members become very close as many circumstances could have brought themtogether, but this does sound rather suspect.
WHy does hse have to close the door when entering his bedroom, I dont understand that.
Talk openly and honestly about how uncomfortable this makes you feel. She's his aunt and secret liasons with her nephew seems strange..
I know you do not want to stand the chance of looking like an insecure person but this is worth looking into since you do love this lady.
Good Luck

Reply to Juzlisen
Posted by: john | 2004/10/19

It looks very fishy

Reply to john

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