Posted by: Tu Spirit | 2008/11/17

Gender troubles

Hi! I' m a 26yr old man. When I was younger, I remember being sexually aroused by women. My father was verbally and emotionally abusive, had an affair and my parents thus divorced when I was 9. This was traumatic for me and I harboured much anger towards him. But we' re great buddies now.At age 13, I remember seeing my guy friend in a Speedo and I became aroused. Since that day, I have been physically attracted to men. My problem is, I don' t want a relationship with a man. I' ve had 1 girlfriend with whom I had a sexual relationship. I' ve never had anal sex with a man (disgusts me), but I have had oral sex/heavy petting/kissing.When I wank, I think of naked men/their -|- s, but afterwards, it always seems so pathetic. I can only imagine myself marrying a woman. I don' t think I am gay. And I am not effeminate. Everyone thinks I' m straight, but I' m so confused. Even though I want a relationship with a woman, I could never tell her naked guys turn me on, women don' t react positively towards that. I don' t really want to be physically attracted to men, but it is just so. This may be controversial but I view the gay lifestyle as a cult and I think that human sexuality is too labile anyway to be limited by such a ridiculous term. I' m not just smart, I' m fiercely intelligent and this complicates matters. No-one knows about this sexual orientation of mine &  I don' t intend to tell anyone bar you. Please advise. Thank you.

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Our expert says:
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Remember, people at large tend not to be 100 % straight or gay, but somewhere on a continuum between the two poles. I really think you would benefit from seeing a good psychologist to explore these issues, and to understand yourself better, and make more informed choices. This would not be with the aim of shifting your sexual preferences in any particular direction, but rather to help you gain more freedom to choose and avoid needless problems. YOu'll need a really intelligent psychotherapist, but the species does exist.
Guys, please don't post fresh questions in response to someone else's question, as this makes it extremely difficult for me to respond --- if Emily or Anonymolus would like to post their questions as a fresh message,. I wil try to respond to them

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Anonymous | 2008/11/17

I' m married with children but as teenager I fell in love with my friend. Then I met my husband and just wated children we had a few and a while back I had this urges to kiss a single woman that felt something for me but supress it as I thought its also cheating and don' t want to harm anybody but still somtimes I surf lesbian porn and think of it and then have the greatest forplay with my husband. I never will give in to this urges to take it futher (unless he should die) cause I' m actually happy.

Reply to Anonymous
Posted by: Tu Spirit | 2008/11/17

You' ve posted your message in the wrong place, Emily.

Reply to Tu Spirit
Posted by: Emily | 2008/11/17

I wou ld like to ask about somethings my boyfriend told me because I was too shy to ask him. 1) He says that blacks don' t have bigger penises than whites (he' s seen whites with HUGE penises in public showers as well as big blacks, and vice versa)
2) Guys often make themselves semi-hard in public showers and walk around naked

Firstly, do blacks have bigger penises than whites?
Secondly, if guys do make themselves semi-hard in public showers, why do they do this and walk around naked?

Reply to Emily

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