Posted by: Claire | 2008/07/21

Follow up: Hubby& #39 s laptop

Hi all, thanks for the replies on post 1768. I did go on hubby' s laptop this weekend, but only found that he put a password on his personal folder file. I really dont know any more. I really just want to forget about everthing but I know I won' t be able to. At home, he gives me a lot of attention and is always trying to do things for me and keeps on telling me how much he loves me, but I' m still confused. I just want to scream: Is there something that I need to know about? I dont want to hurt him by asking to his face if he is cheating. He would be really hurt and I dont want him to feel as though I dont trust him. I know he won' t actually cheat on me, but to flirt with another girl, feels like cheating to me. He gets more than enough sex. Maybe he' s just bored about the way we do it.....i don' t know......(sigh)

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Our expert says:
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Ask him about it, calmly, explaining why you feel uncomfortable, so he can reassure you or at least clarify the situation. And again, how about marriage counselling ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: Leigh | 2008/07/22

Hi Claire,

Please move very carefully and gently. What if nothing is going on? You could destroy something very special. Please let him know how you feel. Don' t accuse him of anything but let him know exactly why YOU feel uncomfortable. You have the responsibility to yourself to clear up the matter, it will not go away and could damage your feelings towards him. Clear it up but be gentle.

Reply to Leigh
Posted by: Me | 2008/07/22

Claire - something is fishy! Why would he suddenly have a password on his personal folder if he does not have something to hide ... ? And flirting with other woman is also cheating. And succesful flirting normally leads to something more. Dont trust him and make sure you find the truth. Unfortunately he will probably deny avarything if you ask him straight, so you will have to find another way to get behind the truth.

Reply to Me
Posted by: SR | 2008/07/21

Claire = If his mailbox is neat and " clean"  then its the end result of a clean up is it not?

Passwords normally include kids names, love ones names, favorite things, nick names, profound names he associates himself with etc

Crack that code :)

Reply to SR
Posted by: anom | 2008/07/21

Claire for your own peace of mind just ask him. If you guys have a open trusted relationship then u can ask anything ask. Whether his gona lie or not well u just then have to live with it. But at the back of his mind im sure he will realise u know something. If his up to tricks..u gona find out eventually...elke hond het sy dag !!!!

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