Posted by: NN | 2007/03/05

Flat mate getting on our nerves!!!!

I need some advice on something that is bothering me at the moment. I moved in with my bf 3 months ago and he was living with his friend of 10 yrs. Things went well at first but then it all went downhill. Hid friend will refuse to help clean up the flat. He works night shift from 10pm til 6am and sleeps for a few hours during the day and then watches tv or sits on his computer but will never get up and clean the house. On the weekends, m bf and I clean the whole flat from top to bottom and his friend just sits in the lounge and watches us or while we are trying to clean the kitchen – he will come and make food. His friend had a washing machine who he lent to a couple that was expecting a child. Unfortunately they lost the child and so a few months after that we asked for the machine back so we could do our washing and my bf’s friend said no he will not ask for it back, as these people are doing his washing and ironing for him. So now we went and bought our own washing machine and now this guy wants to use it. His friend goes through all of our stuff in our room. He even went and watched a “home made” video my bf and I made.. And he went onto the internet and wrote about living with me and my bf and how he hates it and he will get revenge on us. We make supper every night and I refuse to give his friend food as he does not pay towards any food we buy – I have to stand in front of the stove and make the food and my bf is the one who does dishes. Unfortunately we cannot afford to move out for the next couple of months as we are having some money problems – but we will be back on our feet in June this year. This issue with my our flat mate is getting too much for me and it is affecting our relationship. Please could anyone advise?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

,,,,, Can't you get rid of the undeserving and lazy flatmare, or, if its his flat, find someone else to share with ? Why would he want to help with the housework when you all do it for him so nicely ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: indianbabe | 2007/03/05

why dont you just be up front and tell him to piss off?

Reply to indianbabe
Posted by: ME | 2007/03/05

Have the same problem with brother in law. Mentioned it on this forum and got the following advise (worked like a bomb as he is moving out end of this month). Nobody likes to be ignored. Try this. Make only enough food for the two of you and make sure you eat before he wakes up, or before he gets home. Maybe eat in the kitchen, and if he walks in, say "oops, not enough for 3". He will get the message. When doing dishes, make sure you do yours, and leave his there, or go put it in his room. The smell will get to him. On using the washing machine, let him use it, but lock away your washing powder ect. Try make things difficult for him to stay there. Do not know how much guts you have, but try to make him uncomfortable by kissing and cuddling in front of his (seeing that he saw the video) Uncomfortable and ignorance is the best medicine you can give him

Reply to ME
Posted by: SR | 2007/03/05

To the left to the left

Reply to SR
Posted by: RMC | 2007/03/05

take everything of his, put it in a big box and leave it there in his room. lock your bedroom door! who's tv is it? yours or your bf put it into your room.

Reply to RMC

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