Our expert says:
I can understand that this is difficult and I am sure she appreciates your patience in this regard. The question is whether she is "small/tight" or is she stressed and thus "tight"? If I understand you correctly, she does not want you to use your finger.. in the vagina? If so, you need a doctor to do an examination and determine whether it is a physical problem or not. If she however has a psychological resistance with regard to penetration, a psychologist (specialising in sexology) is the best option. Legally in South Africa you are able to consent to sex (older than 16) and I do not think any professional will judge you - technically it will be unprofessional to judge you. Deidre -SASHA
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