Our expert says:
How selfish and thoughtless you husband has been ! And did he have the cheek to expect you to parade around to act out his fantasies, without even bothering to discuss this with you ? Tell him that the way he has chosen to deal with whatever problem he has, so far, has been selfish, hurtful, and self-defeating. If he wants to work things out, challenge him to join with you in proper marriage counselling, to look at ways in which the relationship can become more satisfying to BOTH of you. I agree with nina --- if he can't be bothered to try to improve things for both of you, and by a rational method rather than by a grubby escape route, and trying to put the blame on someone else, then he isn;t serious about the relationship as a whole.
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