Posted by: Jack | 2012/09/06

Fear of Sex and Pregnancy

I''m an 18 year old male. I''ve never slept with anyone because I have an intense and completely irrational fear of pregnancy. If I even get close to intercourse the thought terrifies me and a panic attack kicks in immediately. Not so much that I wouldn''t be able to achieve and maintain an erection, but enough for me to turn around and walk away.

Even though someone can take all precautions, I''m not sure if I can trust condoms enough without worrying. I''m scared that somehow, some way a mishap will happen and a slip up will change my life.

I know I''m young - not that young, by today''s standards - but I''m not in a rush about sex and I understand that I need to be protected against the risks - especially HIV. The pregnancy fear just remains a concern.

It''s worth mentioning that I''m a sufferer of Marfan Syndrome, and thus kids wouldn''t be the best option for me to begin with. It''s also worth mentioning that I had a very bad experience with an ex girlfriend that I''d almost slept with after she slept around, had a baby and tried to tell people it was mine. That, I think, instilled this fear to begin with.

I realize my life can''t go on like this. I''d like to get to a point where I can sleep with a partner without stress. It''s been years since the incident. I''ve been in a few committed no-pressure relationships and I still couldn''t do it.

What do you suggest, doc? To simply act through the fear and use protection?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

tWell, Jack, I'd have to agree that fear of pregnancy in a male is indeed irrational. But am I right in guessing that what you fear is getting someone else pregnant ? Now, there are a number of reasons wny someone might fear intercourse or the whole issue of sexual activity.
With any condition which might be hereditary, you can get specialis advice genetically on whether this is significant enough to take into account in terms of deciding whether or not to father children.
Similarly, when anyone accuses you falsely of making them pregnant, or where hey have multiple candidates as the father of their child, proper blood tests can establish exactly who is and isnt the father. And such an experience could be a reasonable basis for fearing cretaing another pregnancy.
It'd be sensible for you to see a counsellor to work on reducing the irrational excesses of your anxieties, and to achieve your goal of being able to enjoy relationships without unhelpful anxieties.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Maria | 2012/09/07

You''re right, you''re young and there is no need to rush into having sex. The only 100% effective form of contraception is not to have intercourse! If you really feel you want to, why not start with non-penetrative sex. I wonder if you could have a vasectomy at your age given your medical condition?

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