Posted by: Sunshine | 2007/04/19

Father Murdered

Hi Guys

Posted a few days ago and thanks for reply's. tragedy struck our family on the 25th of march. my sisters husband was hijacked, shot and killed. he leaves behind my sister and her 6 year old and 6 month old baby. he was such the wonderful and involved father that the 6 year old is now having trouble dealing with this loss. he goes into a mood where some days he just wants to cry for nothing or find excuses of getting hurt to cry. my concern is growing. a family member bought him a superman dvd. in this movie superman is shot but he doesnt die. the child actually came to me and said, why when superman was shot he didnt die like my daddy did? what do you say to this child? he has such an amazing way of thinking. i turned and said that superman has a magic suite and that what kept him from dying like daddy. so he asked but what is superman takes his suite off? so i said well then he would also sie just like daddy. clearly this child is trying to make sense of what happened to his daddy. how do we help?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Still so sory to head of this awful tragedy. And the kid, of course, is not crying for no reason, but literally crying for "nothing". You have been handling things well so far. But it sounds as though enlisting the help of a counsellor for the child, and maybe to work with the family as a group, would be wise

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Our users say:
Posted by: Spooky | 2007/04/19

The child is far too young to grasp the harsh realities of life. If he should raise the subject again, explain that his father is in a better place now. Channel his thoughts away from this tragedy and focus on helping him to concentrate more on pleasant pass times. Avoid entertainment that includes guns and violence. Frankly I’m puzzled as to why, in the first place, his innocent developing little mind had to be infected and soiled with facts even too vicious for adult minds to process. How thoughtless of someone to have exposed him to these facts so soon! He may now be scarred for life and in desperate need of professional counselling . . . and it’s going to take a darn good shrink to sanitize his little mind in order to free him from this chronic pain and suffering.

Reply to Spooky
Posted by: Buzz | 2007/04/19

I think you handled the Superman incident very well!!!

Reply to Buzz
Posted by: Buzz | 2007/04/19

Sunshine, my heart goes out to this child, and to you and the family - I'm sorry to hear about this shocking experience and tragic loss.

I'd suggest this child (and mother) goes for counselling, as soon as possible.

I wish you and the family well, especially the little one.

Reply to Buzz

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