Our expert says:
I know it sounds desirable for a child to be in contact with the biological father --- but only if this is a caring and genuine father, not someone who has no real interest in the child and is only doing it under pressure. In fact, it is probably less desirable for the child to have a now-and-again dad who turns up irregularly and insincerely, and patently doesn;'t care for or about her.
Its generally desirable to discuss such things with the child as soon as (a) they start asking about such things, and (b) as soon as they are capable of understanding it.
So rather than making this an issue of Telling versus Not Telling, make it something you talk about with her --p hear what she thinks and feels about these men in her life. She obviously has no concept at this age of a Biological Father, and considers as Dad the buy who acts like a daddy.
Maria's idea of the book , which indeed becomes a family heirloom, is an excellent one, and also enables the child to revisit the theme as she grows, and has different questions and increasing capacity to understand the situation. ANd children love stories, including a life story than includes them.
If you need to force the biodad to have ANY sort of relationship with him then that wouldn't be a relationship of value to her.
The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal
advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.