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Question
Posted by: kat | 2006/10/31

family -|- up

hi guys if anyone can help please.

ok my sister and her hubby got divorced 1 yr ago. he is now living with my cousin planing to get married. my sister has full custody of the 2 girls 1 lives with her she is 15 and the other lives with my mom she is 9. ok she is living with my mom coz my sister moved to bedfordview and the ex lives in benoni and the ex made such an issue about the distance that the school sugested that she rather stay with my mom at least she can see her dad evey day. anyway she is with my mom and very happy. now the ex is so over come with guilt that she is with my mom that he is causing such shit. he will not leave my sister alone and is insisting that she mve back with her. my sister is saying that this kid wants to be with my mom as there is is like an only child and gets to see him everyday. she tries to meat with him but he always cancels on her, he just wants to have his say but wont work with her. now the problem is that he is starting to get full of shit with my mom and she doesnt need that. she works long hours at a pub and is tired and is epeleptic and doesnt need his shit. usually she would tell him in no unsertain manner which side of the pineapple would work the best but she doesent need this stress. he wont take the kid to live with him coz the cousin wont allow it and he is full of excuses. now i now that essentially this has nothing to do with me except for the fact that he is now -|- ing with my mother. she wont send the kid back to my sister coz its what is best for the kid. the kid wants to be with her father but the father doesnt want her. he goes to my mothers house after drinking and starts screaming and shouting like and animal and they wont do to much coz the kid is there. how can i defuse this without having him hospitilised?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Your sister's husband wants to marry your cousin ? Lets not bother about what the ex wants, what does the child want ? And what would be best for the child ? That's the only truly important question. And the school therapist should have more insight and more useful suggestions than her last, geographical, one

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: kat | 2006/10/31

thats the thing she was living with my sister changed schools and everything but this child was unbearable even in school how she wants to be with her father thats why the school theropist sugested it might be an option for her to stay with my mom coz the father doesnt want her. thing is when she is with the father she is unbearable, she then manipulates him or ties so that he just stoped fetching her on weekends. my mom will let her go back to my sister but she is happy at my moms place but this idiot father says what will people think that his child is living with the gran. who gives a shit what people think.

Reply to kat
Posted by: kat | 2006/10/31

my sister goes through at least twice a week to see her coz its only a 15 min drive its not far at all.

Reply to kat
Posted by: Dove | 2006/10/31

Please remember that a kid is a baby goat not a child. It does not sound as if any of the family really wants this child. Why can your sister not take her own child back and look after her as she should be doing, change schools if she must. It not be your/her mothers responsibility to look after the child tell her to shape up and take responsibility.

Reply to Dove
Posted by: kat | 2006/10/31

niether mother nor father can control this child even befor the divorce. she is one of those kids that lies manipulates and will get her way regardless.

Reply to kat
Posted by: kat | 2006/10/31

do you do you think my mom should go to the welfare for assistance with this. the ex is currently going through a court case for fruad that why he said he doesnt want the kid.

Reply to kat

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