Our expert says:
Well, you recognize that this feeling isn't reasonable or realistic ( about punishment, that is ) --- but if one is prone to Depression, it can arise during the hormonal turmoil of a pregnancy, and then one should see a good psychiatrist for assessment and a consideration of treatment, whether a carefully chosen medication, or CBT psychotherapy, or both. Generally, one finds mood variable during pregnancy, so the present gloom may well not last. Of course there is hope for you, lots and lots of it. Nothing to be ashamed of --- you didnt choose to feel this way. But, through CBT, you could be able to choose NOT to feel this way and think this way.
And with a first pregnancy, of course it's new territory, so often more worrying than when one is experienced at handling this task. As Kay says, don't try to be a superwoman -- what you are will be quite sufficient !
Keep us in the picture as things progress
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