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Question
Posted by: Frusty | 2005/11/24

ey Dude!

Okay, I have given this some thought, and having two sons of my own, I know that shouting, screaming etc has the exact opposite effect of what you want to achieve. So, my suggestion is this:

Take him out somewhere for a meal or something so that he both of you are out of the environment in which the trouble is. He will be more open to what you have to say. Speak to him calmly and let him know that what he has done has hurt a lot of people and, if possible, tell him how he has hurt them. He is still a child and a child's natural instinct is to want to know how, why, where, when etc. Explain that that what he has done is wrong again telling him why.

You should also make him understand that even though he has done wrong and hurt people, that does not mean he is loved any less, but also make him realise that his behaviour will not be tolerated again. Give him bounderies. Kids must have boundaries.

I hope this has helped you. Good luck.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Excellent suggestion, F. Many people need to hear, and haven't figured out for themselves, that there is a difference between Them and What They Do. One can love Them, and Hate what they did --- and they can change what they do.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Frusty | 2005/11/24

Good for you, Dude. Very wise to calm down first. I walk away and do some thinking before I have my say. I really hope it sorts itself out.

Reply to Frusty
Posted by: Dude | 2005/11/24

thanx Frusty,

iz wud likesay enjoy that kinda thing but jus now iz a bit upset so if ee does not see mee this way it wud b a bit beta as wen iz upset iz also irrational an child like... will probably follow uz advice sooner than later though...

cheers
Dude

Reply to Dude
Posted by: Frank Lee | 2005/11/24

You're a wise lady!!!!!!

Reply to Frank Lee

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