Posted by: anon | 2008/07/08

Excluded from everything

My fiance has a problem with the women in my family. I have stepped away from the situation and taken a look what is going on. The women in my family are very bitchy towards her. They dont invite her to places with them or make any effort at all with her. My fiance is a very caring, giving person and friendly. This situation always leaves us excluded from everything. This hurts me as we dont have much friends because of our previous relationships and family are very important.

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Our expert says:
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Are the women in your family this bitchy towards most other women or outsiders ? Or have they taken some peculiar special dislike to your fiancee ? What happens if you discuss this frankly with them ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: Britty | 2008/07/08

I had the same problem with in-laws, in fact they were awful to me from the very beginning and didin't want me to marry into their family and tried to introduce my husband to someone they thought was more suitable but who turned out to have a criminal record! . I always put up with them and the awful way they treated me for my husband's sake and stayed very much on the edge of the family circle but it was the only way I could survive. Now 20 years on they "love" me and yes its great and makes it easier for my husband however knowing how they were to me in the beginning has made me slightly reserved. I respond to them and am friendly and polite etc but try not to get too involved in their petty squabbles with each other, they fight all the time. I wouldn't wish on anybody what I went through and I would have loved my husband to have stood up to them but I knew he didn't want to risk losing them. I really don't know whether its best to say something or ignore it, its a choice you have to make. Good luck.

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Posted by: Teneal | 2008/07/08

my inlaws were cold to me for many years.they never made me feel at home and never included me in conversations so i stayed away.I finally told them such and they say it was me who did not want to be a part of the family but truth is they really did exclude me and i will never know why. Only now that the years have past & we are getting old are they trying to include me and i am making an effort too but they were bitchy for years.

Reply to Teneal
Posted by: anon | 2008/07/08

They just brush it off and make a person feel like an idiot. They are only bitchy with my fiance

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