Posted by: Vuyiswa | 2013/02/04

Ex wants back after 8 years

Guys and girls please advise this ex has been away for 8 years now he left when my son was 1 week he supported the 1st child but not the 2nd the one he left when he was a week old.

The reason I dumped him he got another women pregnant and denied it, now after 8 years he wants back.
Now my problem is do I take him back or not as I also have difficulty in meeting a good man I was on own my for 5 years in 2010 I tried to get a on and off relationship that dissolved end of last year so in other words do I go back to him because I’ m stranded and desperate or do I continue and fish.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Man | 2013/02/05

Lol stranded and desparate, women at times are a joke.. Are some of u ppl for real? Well u can''t eat ur vomit right?

Reply to Man
Posted by: Amasi | 2013/02/05

From what you are saying is that he loved you then and was willing to stay with but you chose to dump him for denying that he is the father of another woman''s kid.

Getting other woman pregnant after you dumped him for 8yrs is not cheating. You know that since he left you, he was doing it somewhere with someone, so the could have been a kid anyway. Remember after every sex session, it is not upto a man that there is a baby or not. So your problem is more baby mama drama to deal with, timing of those babies is not important.

He puts a blame on you on the issue of support as you could have taken him to maintanance court. Yes he knows his responsibility towards the kids and shyd it away. He sincerly believes you were coping without him. So dont use that as a reason for your decision.

I am just bringing the confusion back to you. How do you see life with him again? Do you see him back for good or for fun? What are your feelings towards him? Will he have " other"  kids outside once you are together?
My point is your reason for separation may not have been sound (you dont have a problem with that he cheated but denying the kid) and what happened when you were not together is part of the garbage you may have to take  sorry I meant package.


There is a nagging question in the back of my mind of how does a guy denies that he is responsible for pregnancy of a specific lady but agrees on others unless he has his doubts, okay that is for another day. Is he not allowed to have doubts if he thinks he is given a Red Jacket?

I personally think that most guys with many kids from different women is because they dont support the kids. I have started a habit of asking guys who boast about number of kids they have if they are supporting them  that makes me uncool.


Reply to Amasi
Posted by: Vuyiswa | 2013/02/04

Thanks for the advice sisi you know mos if something is bothering you, one already has an answer but need I STAMP just to see if they are doing the right thing, I’ m going to block his number, ndizawusokola ndibheka phambili

Reply to Vuyiswa
Posted by: Woman of Integrity | 2013/02/04

Then why even bother to ask for help from us if you know yi nonsense lena nontombi,

Tell him to jump or else he will knock you again and not only you but the kids and i dont think you want to confuse your kids again and i take it as your first knows that daddy is not in the picture and its been years so if he comes back uzothi uvelaphi after all these years.
Think about your kids first sisi not you wena you living for them now its no longer about you anymore

Reply to Woman of Integrity
Posted by: Vuyiswa | 2013/02/04

I don’ t know why all of a surden I used to shut him out not answer his calls or messages but even that if he cared enough he was supposed to support his kids.
What is even worse he’ s got other kids he got from other women in this 8 years hayi man yi nonsense le

Reply to Vuyiswa
Posted by: Woman of integrity | 2013/02/04

Ma Vuyi hay sisi hayi sisi, did you ask him where is he coming from? is he coming back to your life because of he is also not getting out there anymore or he is coming for his child or if he''s coming for his child is he here to stay in his child ''s life or to get what he wants which we both know ukuthi yintoni after getting your cake he will jump,

Are you that desperate my skat to let the person that have been missing in your life for 8 years to come back now? thinkabout it babes and make sure you make the right decision

Reply to Woman of integrity

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