Our expert says:
Unique's supplementary qustion is excellent.
From your subsequent response to that, I understand your question better.
I think part of the problem for many people in such situations is that they fix on the individual, particular person, as though they were absolutely the ONLY person on earth with whom they could have a happy relationship. And that is, fortunately, never true.
In life one makes many mistakes, some of them for the best of reasons. But you need to move ahead, LEARNING all you can from the last experience, so that the next relationship will not have that problem, so you can benefit from your uncomfortably gained wisdom.
After 3 years, is she still sitting around thinking only of you ? Or has she more sensibly moved on and formed new relationships ?
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