Our expert says:
Hello Nicolai, and thanks for your good wishes. I am so sory to hear of this unpleasant experience. Suicide is always sad, and people who do it always underestimate the pain they will cause for other people. It was a bad choice to make, but it was his choice. Sorry too to hear that he may have had an inadequate shrink during that previous admission, but he should have been more demanding, too, and insisted that she pay proper attention and work more energetically with him. I agree with your second thoughts, that he would probably have done it anyway, whether or not you had remained with him --- serious work with a shrink can make a diference ; the best support you could have given, at considerable sacrifice to yourself, would probably not have been enough. And his drinking probably was what tipped the balance, as alcohol is universally depressing and also makes one more impulsive and less wise.
Whatever the emotional nature of your relationship recently, it is upsetting and it is hard to believe that this has happened. How sad, especially, for the daughter and the rest of his family.
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