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Question
Posted by: Matthew | 2007/12/19

Erection problem

Hi! I'm a 25 year old male.I would like to know at what point during foreplay should a man get an erection.I'm avoiding sex because I'm afraid that I might not get an erection.In the past when me and a girl was kissing and touching and I didn't have an erection yet I'd start getting nervous.Then the closer we get to actual sex the more nervous I'd become if I didn't have an erection yet,especially when she hands me a condom and I know I'm nowhere near hard enough to get it on yet.Then it usually ends with me making a lame excuse to get out of the situation.So I'm preoccopied with whether I have an erection yet or not and I don't know if that's just making it worse.I do have erections when I masturbate privately, so I don't know if I have erection problems or whether it's a mental thing.
Could you please advise.

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Our expert says:
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Dear Matthew
If you have erections while masturbating or early in the morning when you wake up, there is no physical problem. You are probably putting too much stress on yourself. Don't think of it as "foreplay" - think of it as just enjoying whatever the moment brings. One does not HAVE to have sex within a certain timespan to enjoy the opposite sex.
dr Bets

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: mich | 2008/06/07

i would like to know more about having foreplay with a guy? my boyfriend can't come when whe have any sort of foreplay. he can only come when he does it himself. i know the problem is not me i had many boyfriends before with no such problem.

he said that no girl could ever get it right. is there any thing that you can do about this. and no he does like only girls.

if we talk about it he gets cross nad said i must leave it. it realy bother me cause i never want to do anything, i can see he enjoy it but never finish. i need to now what it wil do if we get married and want to have kids. will this ever change, what can you do about it.? please reply on my email

Reply to mich
Posted by: billy | 2007/12/19

matthew, you concetrate to hard to get an erection, relax and enjoy your foreplay, do not conentrated on the fact that you are not hard yet, it will come.better ask your girl to play with your penis while you are handeling her.when you thinking of getting hard all the time, your minds drifs off in the wrong direction, next time ask your girl to have a 69 and you will see your penis will jump to attention and you can enjoy it.

Reply to billy

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