Posted by: j | 2009/09/15


I am bipolar and I can feel an episode coming on, a serious depression. But I' m on a roll, I' m looking for a new job and I' ve moved to a new place and I feel really confident generally but NOW: I can feel myself slipping off the edge a little and I want to take control and Not LET IT HAPPEN.
My medical aid is bust so I cannot go see my psychiatrist. I want better things for me but I can feel the wind has been taken from my sails. My family is in trouble, financially, emotionally and it' s affecting me badly. My brother threatens suicide, my sister is breaking up with her fiancee, my dad has emotional problems and is very sad and I don' t know how to help, and my mom has gambled every cent to her name away and keeps asking me for money which I myself do not have else I would be more than happy to help by physically buying her what she needs, as she just gambles money away, my grand parents have not planned for their retirement and are struggling badly.

I got divorced last year and was kicked out of a cosy home where my hubby paid for everything and took care of everything but I GOT BACK UP AGAIN! Made a decision to look after myself and stop whining about not having his money or his lifestyle anymore because if I really want the same lifestyle I enjoyed I HAVE TO WORK FOR IT MYSELF!! I stick to my meds, I' ve ditched the alcohol (saving money and sanity), I' m struggling but I will not make my problems other people' s problems until I have tried to the ends of this earth to pick myself the he11 up!

Why can' t people look after themselves? why? Why? Why? Take responsibility for their screw ups but then GET BACK UP AND CONTINUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And now their sad stories are killing me inside. Killing me!! Tripping me up and I can feel the depression creeping.

I' m so sad. Deeply sad in my heart. I' m sinking into quicksand and struggling between either doing my best to climb up or allowing it to consume me so that I never have to get out again and my existence is extinguished. I don' t mind the latter, it' s looking more and more enticing... I need help and cannot afford it.

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Our expert says:
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I wish more psychiatrists would work with people who have chronic problems so as to rationalize and plan their treatment for a year, so as to allow for enough funding to cover emergencies, according to whatever plan they are covered by.
Have you tried the Anxiety-Depression support group, as a support group could help you get through the next few months ? Maybe a government clinic could help with adjusting the meds ? Your family members must take the responsibility to look after themselves, rather than relying on you, as you have the primary duty of caring for yourself, first.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Kay in Gtown | 2009/09/16

Hi J. I' m BP1 &  cycling continuously for about 3 yrs now. I really feel for you. Don' t wait 4 mths, the longer a BP depression lasts, the more it entrenches, and will only make it harder to climb out. As I’ m sure you know, you need to act NOW, BEFORE the episode gets going. Are you on meds? If you can get them adjusted, you may be able to head off an episode. I’ m sure you also know it has nothing to do with being ‘ strong’   it' s a biochemical matter that needs biochemical intervention.

There should be a (state-run) CPS (Community Psychiatric Services) clinic nearby you, or at least one that visits, if you live in a smaller town. You can see a psychiatrist there free and get meds. If you have a psych hospital near, they' ll have one. I' ve used this in the past when my med aid has pooped out. Universities often have them too, if they train doctors. As CS said, SADAG is a great resource as they' ll know of local resources. They have a web site, sadag dot co dot za.

(I too am divorced, walked out on financial security etc. It' s much harder alone, but I have no more nagging, criticizing etc etc - I' m FREE!)

And you know, in the final analysis, the only adult you are truly responsible for, is yourself. Sad &  harsh, but it' s the bottom line. By letting everyone else' s problems get to you, you' re only more likely to have another episode &  then be of no help anyway. (been there) Take care of you.

Reply to Kay in Gtown
Posted by: BP II | 2009/09/15

Start doing yoga, and start taking a TAURINE, you can get it at dischem really cheap. Also try SCELETIUM (it is a natural mood enhancer, as used by the San, also cheap, at your local health shop. Drink lots of fish oil capsules. The omega 3' s and Vit B complex will help you cope with stress.

Tell yourself to hold on, it' s not that long till net year. Only 4 months. You CAN do 4 months. Good luck! ppl with BP have strong minds, you know you can hold on just a little longer!!!

Good luck!

Reply to BP II

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