Our expert says:
Gay, lesbian and bisexual expert
Hi to you Mary and a very warm welcome to the forum - I think you're aware by now that this is a very welcoming space.
Your post has generated interesting responses - Cornflake_boy suggests (quite rightly) that you can't assume responsibility for your husband's response and Gareth offers tons of valid advice.
A suggestion: don't set yourself up as the intermediary between son and father. Don't form an alliance with either - it sounds as if you'll need to be there to support both. Your husband needs to challenge his own demons and you are not responsible for his prejudices or his homophobia. It is possible that your husband suspects your son is gay - he needs to go through his own process related to this.... Like everyone else he'll have to resolve his own sense of failings, of wondering where he went wrong and his own sense of shame and guilt.
Complements to you (as Gareth points out) for trying to get the facts about your son being gay. Please keep posting.
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