Our expert says:
Well, let's call it a crisis ; its not compulsory to have one in midlife ! But anyone who says he wants to suffer because he hates being alive, is sinificantly, perhaps seriously, depressed. What you describe of his background suggests a cruel and frankly abusive family. They were training him to be a failure with low self-esteem.
If you hunt online, you may find revealing material about Learned Helplessness, a recognized condition in which in such situations people learn to give up, to assume they'll fail, and not try even when they are bound to succeed.
He was carefully trained to be self-scorning and irritatingly needy, but your fairly natural reactions to this may only worsen it.
He needs psychotherapy, and possibly also medication for depression, but certainly to see a psychologist for CBT to change those negative automatic assumptions and behaviours, to reduce the low self-image, and to lean how to become positive and effective. He is still young enough to achieve this.
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