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Question
Posted by: Al | 2004/01/14

Dunno what to do...

I have recently started having a sexual relationship with one of my Colleagues/Friends at work. We were fooling around for a while and then she asked me to have sex with her, seeing that she was a virgin and i didn't wanna get in that deep. (e t pun) We then had sex a couple of times and i recently told her that it was not a healthy relationship as we were only having casual sex. She is now very upset about this and says i only used her.

I do not want to lose her friendship and have even considered going back to shaging her as this would patch things up in the interim, but then the long-term effects of that comes haunting me again. What would you do, not from an outsider's point of view, but if you were in my shoes..

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageSexologist

I would suggest you take out that classic "Fatal attraction" and just sit back and reflect on casual "shagging". Maybe, just maybe you were the one having casual sex, and she was the one thinking she was in a committed monogamous relationship. Can men and women just have "casual sex" realtionships? I suggest the two of you have a grown up discussion about where this is all leading too.

Good Luck
Dr Elna Mcintosh

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

4
Our users say:
Posted by: Al | 2004/01/14

Thanks a lot!

Strange how these answers can seem so vague and embarrassing when you are subjectively involved...

Reply to Al
Posted by: R M | 2004/01/14

This woman like any other will appreciate communication, its the thing least used and works like a bomb. Tell her where you are and what you don't want right now. Make her understand that you never used her, she needs to see past that. Tell her you value the friendsheip and don't want to loose it. It may be too late for that but maybe over time things will sort itself out, but talk to her.

Reply to R M
Posted by: Al | 2004/01/14

Dear R M

That might have been the problem all along but i was just too scared to face this. So do I walk away or try to fix this relationship.

She's nice and all, but im not looking right now and dont wanna go out with her.

Reply to Al
Posted by: R M | 2004/01/14

R U sure she has not fallen in love with you, she might have developed or had feelings for you and now they are stronger and the reason why she feels hurt. In actual fact you were both using each other so she can't point finger at you.

Reply to R M

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