Posted by: Helpless and desperate | 2008/05/30

Dsyfunctional or Stupid?

I would like to know whether my in laws are dysfunctional or plain stupid - and where i can get help for them. My father in law in 55 has no legs, bed ridden, depressed, diabetic, still smokes and has been extremely ill over the last few months. He is always in and out of hospitals(goverment), never gets theproper treatments and gets referred from one to another. My mother-in-law has been a theatre nurse at a private hospital for over 20 years and has not bothered to get him on medical aid or even get proper treatment for him.

They also live in a house with my younger brother-in-law(25) who is is mentally handicapped. he speaks like a normal person, but cannot function in the real word,cant communicate properly, bad co ordination, is on meds for temper, agression , has ocd dyslexia and the mother treats him like a 6 year old. He sleeps in the same bed with his mother.

My husband is the only sane one in the family and has absolutely no control over what goes on there, all he does is tries to satisfy their requests, taking to hospital, running errands etc. He can't negotiate treament for any of them, as a result it is a constant strain on our marriage and our family. Who can help them, how can they get help? what can I do to not let of this get to me?

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Our expert says:
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Thank you for visiting

It is a very difficult situation and I recommend that you consult a psychiatrist for advice, as well as treatment for the whole family.

Good luck and kind regards

Dr Anrich Burger

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