Posted by: Almost mad | 2008/11/17

Doc, whats going on???

Doc, I feel sad about whats happening today on this site. I always felt that this was a safe haven for people with problems. Today I have seen some really harsh comments that were unnessasary. Am I being oversensitive or do you agree with tough love when it comes to people wanting to commit suicide. I know when I felt that low, if someone had spoken harshly to me I might have just killed myself there and then. Please reassure me that people like myself are still safe to say we feel like commiting suicide or even that no one can change our mind. Because if we put our messeges through and someone says something positive that could just save a life.

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Our expert says:
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Of course, I hope folks realize, once I have responded to a posting, I don't see it or any subsequent comments on it, again. I'm sorry if there have been nasty comments arising. I don't hold with a tough love approach to suicidal people, nor an over-indulgent one. As you say, all the weight of evidence and experience ( including our experience here within this forum ) is that its the kindly words that save lives, not the hostile ones.
I think one must also recognize that where there are VERY angry and hostile responses, this is usually not actually about the person who posted the original message, but reflects something deep and murky and nunfinished in the person posting the hostile response. Where there is a little value in such responses, is that they may remind the original poster of the depth of felings they may arouse in others, which may be far more than they expected.
Of course you, and anyone else, remain free to post any sincere message about yourself and your feelings.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Daisy | 2008/11/18

Almost mad, I am so glad you wrote this message! I agree, the messages was really upsetting.
After reading them and almost getting involved myself, I decided to never post again... no matter how and what I felt.

I want to be a faceless person where I can honestly say how I feel without being judged... Not sure that it is safe to do so anymore.

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