Posted by: Shocked | 2008/06/14

Do I say something

CS, I posted to you about a month ago about my son's 6 yr olod friend who tried to get my 5yr old to perform oral sex (Copy attached below). O.K, this little boy said another boy from preprimary showed him this game in the bathroom. The boy he 'blamed' goes to an aftercare where gr 00 to gr7 mix. On Friday I am at a birthday party and another mom tells me how her son went hysterical a few days after starting at the same aftercare and he screamed when she took him there. He started having accidents and told her he did not want to go to the toilets there because a big boy does stuff to them in the bathrooms.. She immediately removed him and when she approached the aftercare centre, they brushed it off.

I am convinced that somehow these young kids are being molested at the aftercare. My kids dont go there and I have no proof - just to many 'fishy' coincedences. Do you think I have the right to go to the boy;s parents and tell them their son may have been put at risk and do I ask them to take it up with aftercare or do I? Am I reading to much into this?

My original post:

Doc, This afternoon, I walked into my son's (5) room and found him and his friend (friend is 6) naked with the friend trying to give my son instructions on how to perform oral sex. (When I walked in he was trying to 'sit' on my son's face and asked him to put his penis and testicles in his mouth. My son is 5. I am 100% sure my son has never seen any pornographic material (he only watches animated disney movies), he has never slept out and he has certainly never seen his dad and I naked before. The little friend had a huge erection. I told both boys to get dressed an the friend admitted the 'game' was his idea. I asked him who taught him the game and he said another boy at school. We told both boys very clearly that any game involving any private area is strictly off limits and if they are not sure, they come and ask first. They were alone in the room for no more than a minute. When the friend closed the door, I got suspicious and stood at the door listening. I told the boy's dad waht happened and he said he will speak to his son and find out where he saw this. The boy comes from a home where drug and alcohol abuse was rife and often spends holidays with a family member that has the same problems. I am scared that my son may try this on someone else now that he was exposed to this. We made it clear that those games wont be tolerated and I also dont want to make more of an issue about it than is necessary. I am just in a bit of shock that a 6y old child would even know about oral sex.

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Our expert says:
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Gosh. Personally, in such a situation, I would take this up with child welfare authorities and Childline --- aren't all daycare facilities supposed to be rgulated and licensed by the authorities ? ANy such daycare would be expected to take ANy such report to them very seriously indeed.
And try to tactfully approach the other mum, too, who surely wasn't satisfied by getting the brush-off from that daycare centre/ As I think I said at the time, some sexual play occurs naturally between kids, but its mainly very low-key showing and fumbling. Such a sophisticated and adult act seemed at the time of your first mesage, to be likely to have been started by a kid or kids being molested by an adult or older child, and thus learning this particular "game". Now this boy at the centre may well himself have been molested by someone else, even the staf could come under suspicion, especially as they were apparently so keen to ignore such an alarming report.
Surely the right think to do wen something so fishy is going on and affecting children adversely, is to report it to the child welfare and other relevant authorities for proper investigation. Maybe CHildline can help you identify the appropriate people in your area to help you do this
let us know what transpires

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Our users say:
Posted by: Shocked | 2008/06/15

Thanks CS, I will let you know.

Reply to Shocked

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