Posted by: NV | 2007/08/25


I love my hubby.been married for 8 years now. Have 2 kids. We have sex once every 4 months - if that much! I will send him messages - sms's e mails suggesting things - andf wont even get a reply...He will make rude remarks about me being overweight and commenting on my friend's personality traits and be very critical.We are all just human - sure I have mistakes - I'm not perfect.But the question is - is there someone perfect out there anyway? I am feeling very lonely - he is not my best friend. I cannot talk to him about my deapest concerns and dreams. He keeps putting me down and abusing me emotionally.I cannot stand this anymore and want a divorse rather than having extramrital affair. I am scared because of these feelings. We've been for counselling - didnt work as yet.Maybe if I loose weight?? Is that really all that is important to a man?? I dont understand as I am pretty and many men are looking at me...I feel lonely and want to leave...but I am scared.....

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Our expert says:
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There's nobody perfect out there, and if your husband is so unkind and foolish as to make disparaging comments about your atractiveness, I'll bet he himself is no stunning adonis, either. SOunds more like a guy making excuses. Your comments sound as though the pair of you are trying counselling, and haven't found the results convincing so far. PErsist, and give it your best shot, and assk the counsellor to discuss these options frankly with the pair of you. I realyl doubt that your moderate weight gain is highly significant here. Maybe he has been stressed at work and may have been losing his virility lately, and would prefer to see this as all your fault, rather than take responsibility for himself

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