Our expert says:
Well, no-one outside the situation can give a definite answer on such decisions. But your reaction is entirely reasonable. If he's merely separated, and hesitates to actually go ahead and divorce his wife, he's hardly able to committ himself to a new relatonship. She may be closer to moving on than he. But you're right --- you cannot realistically plan a future with a man who chooses to remain attached to his separated wife, until he makes up his mind one way or the other. Now only you know him well, and you need to assess him without gazing through the sunglasses of love. What are his intentions ? Is he a chronic ditherer, who will need to be pushed ? Or is he simply being lazy, and enjoying the best of both worlds so far, and feeling reluctant to cange a situation that happens to suit him ? If you just leave things to take their own course, will he move closer to resolving the situation, or will he jus leave things dangling for as long as he can get away with it ?
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