Our expert says:
WHoever said that to you is a total idiot. As Buzz says, people who indulge in pain competitions deserve to be ignored --- she was obviously extrapolating from her own profound bitterness and not at all thinking about your feelings. But if you are still at a standstill in your grief after 4 1/2 years, it would be a good idea to see a counsellor to work on this, so that you can adjust better to the loss.
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