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Question
Posted by: anon | 2006/10/30

Distraught over nightmare

Hi

I was molested by my father as a child. I have told my husband this and as a result he does not like to visit with my parents as he is very angry at my dad. We fight about this as I have forgiven my father and want to see my family. I am also expecting our second child.

Last night I had a horrible nightmare - I dreamt my parents house was my house and the room that use to be mine is now my sons room. I was sleeping and woke up at 5:51 (in my dream and I can remember looking at the clock and the time was 5:51 exactly) I heard voices from my sons room. I went there and found my husband on top off my son, molesting him.

I pulled him off and calmed my son down, I then took a criket bat and hit my husband uncotrolably, while i was crying and screaming, I pressed charges agains him as well.

Why would I dream this, I feel so hurt. My husband would never do something like this but when I see him I just want to smack him!!
Why did I dream this? My husband and I fought about my father again over the weekend.

I need help - I dont want this dream to make me angry towards my husband.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

The dream wasn't realy about your husband, but your anxieties, raised by your husband's understandable continued suspicious about your father, that your father might molest your son. In the dream you too action against your husband ( who has done nothing wrong ) of the sort that perhaps in some ways you regret not having done to your father who was an child abuser. See a counsellor to work on your own problems, preferably with a CBT approach.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

2
Our users say:
Posted by: kat | 2006/10/31

i agree with Momof3 and didnt reply yesterday coz i didnt know what to say, but now i have to ask is your son now the age you were when you were molested? you see your father was the male figure in your life and your hubby the male figure in your sons life. maybe that is why you had the dream coz of your sons age its is bringing back those memories. if you get what im saying. i do think counseling is in order.

Reply to kat
Posted by: Momof3 | 2006/10/30

Hi anon.I am sorry to hear that you had such ahorrible time with your dad.I think perhaps you say you have forgiven him but not really deep down.Your husband is concerned for you and is trying to protect you from further hurt by visiting your parents(your dad) but you ,I feel you are going through great turmole in your relationship with your husband as aresult your are thinking about it all the time and it plays on your mind when you sleep and thus the nightmares.

Some dreams can seem so real in the morning that you do feel that it has happened,for real.I have had one or two like that and you have to convince yourself that it was only adream and did not really happen.

I think it would be good for you to see acounselor and later for your husband to join you.You might need to work out some things on your own first and then to work on your relationship.The conflict betwwen you and your husband at the moment has brought all these things floading back.

Seek help and ask yur therapsit if your husband should come with you from the start or seperate for awhile.
Good Luck and please dont wait too long.tryr and work on all this before the 2nd baby comes along.-hormoes can also play a big role in the emotial issues.

Reply to Momof3

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