Our expert says:
In someone with a tendency to seek pill-popping solutions to life problems, and a possibility of over-using or abusing such meds, it would be FAR preferable for her to receive Cognitive-Baehavious Therapy ( CBT ) counselling to lift her anxiety and depression. and help her learn to cope better.
It sounds as though she has been excessively jealous in a way that often speaks of personal low self-esteem, and CBT could help that, too.
Her reaction to this disappointment in the relationship is excessive and totally maladaptive, and also speaks of a need for professional help.
Your reaction of frustration when she insisted on maintaining a self-defeating and self-propagating misery was entirely understandable, if not ( when it came to the outburst of damaging yourself ) and her reaction is excessive. She is not wanting or using the support she demands, but taking out on you the frustration and anger she doesn't dare express directly to the man who VERY UNDERSTANDABLY chose to leave her.
Constant provision of "uplift" to someone who neither appreciates it nor uses it is not something one can reasonable expect of anyone else. She clearly hasnt even though of the problems you personally are dealing with, and that is selfish and self-absorbed, in a ery immature way.
I agree with maria - you too are far too close and intertwined in this problem. She should be seeing a proper professional and not relying on you to give an endless supply of re-assurances.
She shouldnt need to be on Cilift for years, for anxiety, She sounds emotionally spoilt, and having tantrums like a far younger chil, and not the self-supporting adult she ought to be at her age.
She should see a psychologist ASAP, for a proper assessment and to start CBT psychotherapy ; the psychologist can advise whether adding a medication might help, and that can be assessed by a psychiatrist if necessary.
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