Our expert says:
SO sorry to hear of this tragic situation, PP. Great that you have met a genuinely great man ; tragic that he is so seriously ill. But don't think of him as "the one" in the sense of him somehow being the one and only good man on earth. He may be one of the relatively few, but not entirely unique among the species. I hope you are working with the Cancer Association and the nearest Hospice Group to be sure that between you he can receive adequate and expert symptom control. <br>As for yourself, you richly deserve to see a good counsellor (maybe starting with someone from the Hospice or Cancer Association) for yourself. Sad that one may have made some stupid decisions, but at least you recognize them for what they were, which provides the opportunity to learn from those experiences and to avoid them in future. <br>Proper depression treatment would be more useful than sleeping pills, which don't help depression --- but don't stop them suddenly, and ask your doc /shrink for specific advice on coming off them gently as your depression treatment starts to be effective. CBT counselling is excellently effective at changing the sort of negative approach to life you have slid into, and at helping you find genuinely positive ways to approach life instead, with real benefits.
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