Our expert says:
There is such a thing ( and this sounds like it ) as Pathological Jealousy, often based on such factors as a person having such a low opinion of themselves that they assume nobody would want to be faithful to them .
Also, you are indeed describing an emotionally abusive relationship. It is mistaken for anyone to stay in an abusive relatonship "for the sake of the kids" as it is NOT good for kids to grow up in an abusive household, full of threats, abuse and tension.
Fortunately it is NOT true that "no-one" can help you. Help is indeed available. There are, for instance, organizations like POWA which pecialize in helping abused women to plan a safe escape, wih their children, from abusive situations, and they should also offer counselling and support.
Similarly, various social services should be able to help. A court can give you a protection order when you leave, foprbidding him to contact or threaten you, and he would go to jail if he ignored such an order. It is possible for you to be safer and happer, together with your children. Maybe eventually on his own he would recognize his need for treatment and begin to lose his excessive jealousy, though this is uncommon
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