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Question
Posted by: sad | 2004/01/13

depressed after maternity leave

I have started work after being on maternity leave for 5 months. My baby is almost 5 months and is staying with my mom in law. I'm so sad and feel as though I want to cry all the time. I know that if my baby cries my mom in law wont be honest with me and she'll tell me that everything was fine. Another thing that makes me sad is that she wants to raise the child her own why and she wont listen to the way that I would like her to raise my child.

I'm sick and tired of arguing about this with my husband and now feel as though I have nobody to talk to and I'm bottling everything up inside me. I know that after this sadness has passed, I'll probably 'explode' and say things very nastily!

Plse help!

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Dear Sad,
This sounds AWFULLY like Post-Natal Depression, a combination of effects of the hormones that have waxed and waned, and of the psychological stresses of parenting a new baby. The creche is a potentially good idea, but it sounds like you could really benefit a lot from seeing a psychiatrist for a full assessment and advice on treatment, as a postnatal depression can become severe and cause needless misery, while it usually responds really well to treatment.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: san | 2004/01/14

I know exactly what u are going through as I've been through the same hell when my first baby was born. The feelings you're going through are being picked up by your baby and this is going to affect him/her adversely. Even though it will cause conflict between u and your husband, you might want to cosider placing your baby in a creche or with a good day mother. Your husband will take this as meaning that his mother is incompetent, but in the long run he will understand when he ses that and the baby are happier. BE STRONG and have faith in your decision, because your happiness determines that happiness of your baby and ultimately your husband.

Good luck and God bless!!!

Reply to san
Posted by: J | 2004/01/13

Look for a day mother or a creche in your area. Leaving your child with a parent who does not respect your wishes is a recipe for disaster. If she is hurt Im sure she'll get over it.

Reply to J
Posted by: Bella | 2004/01/13

Firstly i would suggest putting your child in a creche, it would be beneficial for the both of you - my daughter attends a creche and its the best thing i could do for her they develop so well and learn to interact with other children. And at least that way your mother in law would not have to be so involved in the upbringing of your child. This is your kid not hers - at the end of the day your decision should be final

Reply to Bella

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