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Question
Posted by: DEPRESSED | 2008/06/10

DEPRESSED

I am 34 yrs old and been married for 10 years. I have a good husband and although we do have our problems, it has been a relatively good 10 years. We have 2 children. The problem is, it has now come to light that my husband cheated on me while we were dating. I can't seem to forgive him for that. It may sound so stupid cause at least it was before marriage. I feel so disspointed in him and almost distrustful and resentful. How can I get over this.. I keep on thinking about it and can't seem to get over it. Am i being silly?????? I just never expected it from him....

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Obviously it was wrong for him to do so ( and I wonder how you found out at this late stage ) --- but though you're not being silly, not at all, you're not being wise. If there is been no cheating since the marriage, you have no real grounds to be so upset, especially at this late stage --- it's understandable that you found this upsetting, but the anger and angst at this time is unpleasant for you and not at all useful. See a counsellor to work on getting over this, maybe some indivisual sessions for yourself, and then perhaps some sessions he could join in

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