Our expert says:
Sounds like a good example of a common situation. When the one problem ( the bedroom problems in this case ) could probably be relatively easily solved, were it no for the second problem, of non-communication. Trying to solve such problems without talking abou them, is like trying to make a Christmas cake without touching any of the ingredients.
Yopu can approach this subtly and usefully, not be communicating a blanket comment on dissatisfaction, but by complimenting him on whatever he does right, or nearly right, suggesting that you'd really like more of X which he does so well ( even if he barely does it ). Maybe suggesting calmly that there's something different you would like to try with him. Maybe asking him if there's more you could do which he might find more pleasing ( and encouraging him to think likewise). Rather as emma suggests.
I don't believe that you are "the problem" but that approach mnight interest him in finding a solution, to "your problem" so long as we don't have to even suggest that anyu of it might be "his problem".
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