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Posted by: Tired | 2006/10/30

Dead and waiting to be burried

I seriously do not see myself living too long. I know the choice is not mine, but I can defenately not go on like this.

I have absolutely nothing to live for, work cause I need the money and have a daughter that would actually be better off without me.

I have never been so down in my life. I was fine after my 3 suicide attempts in Feb and thought that I was rather silly and that there will always be a way, rememberring the writing "we'll find a way". I tried and tried but my life has fallen apart and things are worst and worst every day.

I have been on anti depressants for the past 7 months. I just don't want to wake up in the mornings. I do not make plans for the next day, cause I might just not wake up.

I am not allowed to have any sleeping or calming tabs with my medication, but unfortunatley I suffer exttreme anciety attacks and cannot sleep.

There's a lot of things that constributed to this like my horrifying childhood, lonleyness and insecurities.

How do get out of this hell hole?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

There is absolutely NO WAY that your daughter would be better off without you --- don't ever give in to that delusion. From your description, it is clear that you are on the wrong antidepressants, and they are not working for you --- see a different shrink for a second opinion, and include all options for treatment, medication and CBT therapy, which could make a major difference. I am shocked to hear that your shrink could have not noticed how comprehensively you have not been helped by his treatment, and that he/she has not referred you to someone with more experience and knowledge to get you treated more effectively. Don't let whoever made your childhoopd horrifying, win --- rather, work with a CBT counsellor and others and make sure it is YOu who win a victory over the depression, and move on to a happier life

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Momof3 | 2006/10/31

Having lost a Mom to breast cancer when I was 10 and a Dad to blood clot after a knee operation at 12. I can tell you that your daughter will not be better off.You are her MOM and she needs you.She would love you to see her matriculate, her 21st and and best of all her Wedding day and her future husband.She would love you to be there to ask advise on pregancy and the birth and raising her child.I did not have that and I can tell you how I miss my parents and which they could have been at my wedding and to see my 3 boys.I like to beleive that they are watching us from heaven.As they could not control there death but you can.Please do Not leave your daughter without a Mom.It is no fun buying books to learn about all the birth stages and what to do and how to handle depression after the birth and have a loving helping Mom around to ask for advise and to share special moments.

Please go see a new therapist and go to CBT counselling.I am sure you will be happier.

Reply to Momof3
Posted by: kat | 2006/10/30

find a new theropist one who is actually qualified in helping people and not just prolonging things. your daughter wouldnt be better off without you coz if you had to try kill yourself again just think of the legacy you leave behind for her.

Reply to kat

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