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Question
Posted by: selfhurt | 2005/07/06

cutting myself helps me

Hi. Im 21 and gay. In highschool i tried to commit suicide serveral times, lastly by cutting my wrists. I didnt do it properly but i realised that afterwards i felt better, very guilty, but better. It just got worse and worse, my arms are covered in cut marks. I stopped recently when several friends started checking my arms. But i cant stop thingking about it, its drving me insane, not just when im depro, even when im happy, i want to do it. And when i do it i feel guilty but i just do it over and over again. I dont know how to stop the feeling of wanting it. Maybe you have some advice for me?
Thank you.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Cutting never helps. In the moment when you feel bad, it might very temporarily let you feel a litle better, but the effects obviously doesn't last, or you'd never need to do it again. It can become an obsessive, almost addictive bad habit, and as you are discovering, one with serious consequences. Search the archives of this forum for our many previous discussions of different aspects of cutting, and examples of how beneficially other readers have managed to give it up, especially with the aid of a good shrink, which is what you deserve. You can stop, and should stop ; and, if you give yourself a fair chance, you will stop.
Keep in contact with us here on the forum, and tell us about your progress.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: STOP | 2005/07/07

HI SELF HURT i have read about your problem once in the people mag but unlike you this person was a girl and she also said she had great satisfaction in this and it wasnt only when she was down or happy like you she thought about it all day and neally lost her life as it becomes an obsession what she said was that she had to go for help her gp referred her to someone who was able to help if i was you i would get help because the damage is great and everytime you cut yourself you are scarring your body and that will never go away imagine the looks you will get when you go out in summer and how you might have to explain what you do to someone you might really care for and what if he doesnt whant someone who does this sort of thing because not all things are acceptable to people if scares people when they dont understand the satisfaction and the guilt that it brings you will always be an emotional roller coaster and your freinds will tire of you ... think it over and get some help...

Reply to STOP
Posted by: MaXi | 2005/07/07

Hi Selfhurt,

You obviously have friends that care about you. You should NEVER forget that!
By hurting yourself you are hurting your friends aswell - Maybe that is why you feel guilty - because you know its wrong and you know that you are hurting your friends.

YOU have to decide not to do that anymore. You are not in highschool anymore.
Highschool is a sh!t place - people there have no sympathy or understanding, if you don't fit in, then you're screwed. I felt like killing myself in highschool but I'm glad that I didn't because life is so much more fulfilling than dumb school.

Being gay is not an issue now-a-days. I think you should see a councellor about the cutting. Or even talk about it with one of your good friends. Friends will always listen. And this forum can be a great support system - hope to hear how you doing soon!!

I wish you all the best - and remember that if you feel alone there is always someone thinking of you hoping you're fine.

Good luck! :0)

Reply to MaXi
Posted by: red rose | 2005/07/07

Dear Self hurt....
i think yours i some kind of paranoia and seriously believe that you have to go to professional help. please do not do it again because as ur friends are checking your arms, that means they care about you. if when you do it again, you do it wrong...you will leave alot of ppl crying over u.

Good luck

Reply to red rose
Posted by: SR | 2005/07/07

Selfhurt = What seems to frustrate you the most about feeling totally comfortable with yourself? Who pushes your buttons, someone out there or are you the source of your own frustration?

Reply to SR

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